I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
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