Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
well most of my day revolves around power hour
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
