I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
Randomize
