well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
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