i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
Randomize
