I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
