She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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