if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
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