Texts From Last Night

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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.

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  (612): is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused. http://tfl.nu/sovs
  Replies (100) Good night (1195) Bad night (5973)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp

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  (513): you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp http://tfl.nu/1q8y
  Replies (23) Good night (4814) Bad night (767)
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  (509): View more from Washington

  Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.

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  (509): Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup. http://tfl.nu/26kw
  Replies (14) Good night (1524) Bad night (5733)
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  (604): View more from British Columbia

  I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex

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  (604): I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex http://tfl.nu/9dx2
  Replies (17) Good night (5738) Bad night (1789)
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  (506): View more from New Brunswick

  Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach

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  (506): Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach http://tfl.nu/g758
  Replies (14) Good night (851) Bad night (6861)
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  (540): View more from Virginia

  Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.

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  (540): Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza. http://tfl.nu/9mae
  Replies (11) Good night (827) Bad night (3984)
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  (619): View more from California

  Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.

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  (619): Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this. http://tfl.nu/9259
  Replies (13) Good night (1811) Bad night (1368)
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  (417): View more from Missouri

  Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.

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  (417): Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go. http://tfl.nu/8zsf
  Replies (15) Good night (2142) Bad night (812)
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  (224): View more from Illinois

  They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.

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  (224): They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship. http://tfl.nu/ra28
  Replies (4) Good night (752) Bad night (1223)
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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.

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  (402): Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun. http://tfl.nu/qwzs
  Replies (3) Good night (1583) Bad night (808)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?

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  (717): do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met? http://tfl.nu/fj36
  Replies (7) Good night (1168) Bad night (594)
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  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.

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  (405): I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow. http://tfl.nu/lb44
  Replies (2) Good night (578) Bad night (432)
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  (907): View more from Alaska

  As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.

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  (907): As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan. http://tfl.nu/b2sh
  Replies (2) Good night (532) Bad night (272)
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  (321): View more from Florida Space Coast

  Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.

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  (321): Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning. http://tfl.nu/diz8
  Replies (2) Good night (665) Bad night (282)
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  Brb crying the tears of my youth

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  (201): Brb crying the tears of my youth http://tfl.nu/pe8b
  Replies (0) Good night (269) Bad night (233)

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