i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Randomize
