Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(321): View more from Florida Space Coast

even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him

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(+64): View more from New Zealand

The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.

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(907): View more from Alaska

You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now

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(337): View more from Louisiana

Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(615): View more from Tennessee

The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one

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(262): View more from Wisconsin

one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!

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(513): View more from Ohio

Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup

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(714): View more from California

I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.

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(516): View more from New York

I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this

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