Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic