I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
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