she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
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So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
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Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
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