I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
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