this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
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