I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
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