Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize