Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
Randomize
