wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
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