she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
