I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Randomize
