Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Randomize
