So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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