I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Randomize
