apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
Randomize
