My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
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