also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
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