Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There r osticjed everywhere
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
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