god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
God, you're like boner-b-gone
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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