it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
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