that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
Randomize
