i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
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