dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
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