he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Randomize
