What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
