i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
