I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
