what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
A+ Viking dick
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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