Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
Randomize
