Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Randomize