that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Randomize
