party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
i believe in u and ur pee
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Randomize
