He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
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