There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
Is Oprah even human
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.