Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
23 People Noticed Deal Breakers in Their Partner A Little Too Late
There r osticjed everywhere
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
23 Millennials Confess The Things They Wish They Weren’t Attracted To
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?