Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
Randomize
