Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
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