My liver just broke up with me...
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Randomize
