the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
Randomize
