Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
Randomize
