in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
