the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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